I pull up to my mother in laws house and tell Tristan and Eireland, "Ok, have a great day! Tristan, remember I'm seeing your teacher this afternoon! I love you both."
Before Tristan's little hands could grab at the door handle, he shouts, "MOM! YOUT FORGOT TO PRAY FOR US!" (I don't think he actually knows how to speak in a normal tone, everything is done yelling.) We have made a habit of praying before each child gets out of the car at their destination. Indeed, today I forgot.
This is more than a normal little boy reminding me that we forgot to pray. You see, Tristan is struggling in his faith. Don't get me wrong, he's 6, I'm not expecting him to pass a theology class. But he is struggling. Often times at night when we pray together and I ask for his requests, he is not even interested in praying, and doesn't want to be a part of it. Thus, I simply lay my hand on him, grab Phoenix's hand and pray FOR Tristan. As well as praying for all the 'bustruction' trucks and workers in the whole wide world! (In case you work in this field-or know someone who does- know that you are being prayed for every night by my 4 year old. Your safety and the proper functioning of your vehicles is his top priority.) For him to not only remember to pray, but want to be involved in the prayer is a HUGE step for him. This doesn't mean I expect the same to happen tomorrow, he changes from moment to moment. But we celebrate the victories and the success, not the failures. By celebrating the successes we give the glory to God, not a stronghold to the enemy by focusing on the failures.
I never want to force my faith on my children. As a Christian and as a mother, of course, I want to see my son follow Christ. I want to encourage every opportunity for that. I do not want him to become bitter and angry that I force something on him- he has a very strong will and doesn't like to be told what to do. My strongest defense to to simply pray over him and this situation, and to lead by example.
We attend church twice a week. One service I attend, and one service I have the honor of working with a group of adorable little 4th graders. Sometimes this is too much for Tristan, and he stays home with his dad, sometimes he makes it to both services. He always makes it to one. He has questions, his mind is curious on some nights and he is wonderfully receptive. Other nights, not so much. Again, it is a moment by moment process.
So, all that being said, we prayed this morning. We prayed Tristan would have a good day and that he would keep his pyramid pieces. We prayed for his dad and his sisters and his brother, and although I lead the prayer he participated with his whole heart. <3 Success! God gets the glory.
I realize that a lot of my blog posts and prayers revolve around Tristan. There is a reason. He does not have any more of my love, attention, focus or prayers than my other children do, not at all. But because he is the child that at this point in time is teaching me the most about being a mother. He is opens my heart and mind to new ideas and new ways to parent. He taught me that parenting is not a cookie cutter concept. He needs different parenting than my other 3 children. I feel sharing my journey of being Tristan's mom is important, because I know there are others in a similar situation. With a similar strong willed child. These children are a axing gifts from God- each child is, but with the strong willed child comes the opportunity not just to teach them, but also to grow ourselves.
Tristan age 3. We were at Disneyland for his 3rd birthday- he hated it.
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